April 29, 2012
Message by Bill Denning

April 22, 2012
Message by Bill Denning

April 8, 2012
Message by Bill Denning and Ed Palpant

April 1, 2012
Message by Thomas Collings

Let’s look at another important step in befriending others.

Be a good listener.

The Bible tells us to be quick to listen. So how do we do that? It seems to me that some people are much better at being a good listener than others. While one’s personality may affect a person’s natural tendency to listen, there are some basic skills we all can learn that will help us become better at listening.

Stop talking:

God gave us two ears and one mouth. That should be a sign!

Remove distractions:

Sometimes the TV needs to be turned off or the door needs to be closed or the cell phone put away. In other words, give the person your full attention.

Be patient:

Give others the time they need to share what’s on their mind before you jump in with your replay. Listening is not waiting your turn to speak.

Connect with the other person:

Look at them and nod when you agree. Ask questions. Then listen some more. Restate what you’ve just heard and ask if you got it right.

Be relaxed:

Give the other person permission to say what they want. And watch your emotions. If what you hear creates an emotional response in you, be careful. When our emotions increase, our listening decreases. Even if you disagree, you need to let them express their opinion. Sometimes when we argue and win, we lose something much more important.

Stop talking:

God gave us two ears and one mouth. That should be a sign! Oh, yeah. I already shared this one before – but it’s worth repeating! In the days ahead, make a commitment to befriend those who don’t have a church home. You’ll be glad you did – and so will they!

March 18, 2012
Message by Bill Denning

1. Be careful not to criticize.

2. Use honest and sincere appreciation.

3. Focus on the interests of those you are befriending.

Let’s look at a couple more suggestions. The next one is easy or, at least it should be.

4. Smile!

There’s just something about a smile that is inviting. We all like being around folks who smile and smile a lot! So smile when you talk to others. It sends the right kind of signal to those you are befriending for Christ. It says that you are open and interested. A smile encourages friendship. So … smile, smile and then smile some more. Here’s another suggestion that, for me, is much harder.

5. Remember a person’s name

This is one of the most important things we can do when befriending another person. There is nothing any worse than being in a conversation with someone you have just met and you can remember his/her name. One technique I use is to repeat the name back to the person when they tell me their name. If it’s an unusual or difficult name I’ll have them repeat it. And then I’ll repeat it back and ask them if I got it right. You might also write down the person’s name and jokingly say something like, “Now that I’m over 50, I’ve got to write things down. Otherwise I will forget!” Now, you have to be over 50 to use this one but I think you get the picture. The truth is, remembering a person’s name is one of the most important things we can do.

March 11, 2012
Message by Bill Denning

The First Impressions Team creates a warm, comfortable and welcoming environment for our guests understanding that the first few minutes of a visit are the only time we have to make a great first impression. Many times it is this first impression that is the determining factor in a guest’s decision to return. The team captures contact and other information from our guests in order to follow up with them. Team members distribute information about River Oaks and answer questions about the church that guests may have. They also assist guests with finding their way around the building and help with children as needed.

Members of this team need to have a desire to help guests feel welcomed and as comfortable as possible. Smiling at, greeting warmly and talking to the guest is essential. Being confident and comfortable talking with people you don’t know is an important trait to have because if the team member feels uneasy around new people our guests will pick up on that fact. A team member must be positive and upbeat. He/she must smile and communicate friendliness to the guests.

Here are the specific responsibilities we have put together to date. These probably will be modified as we get things started with this new team.

FIRST IMPRESSIONS TEAM SPECIFIC RESPONSIBILITIES

1. Arrive at the church building no later than 10:45 am. This will allow time to make sure the “Guest Welcome Center” is set up and all materials are in place.
2. Wear name tag to identify yourself as a team member
3. Write “thank you” note to guest and give note to Pastor Bill to be mailed
4. Attend First Impressions Team training
5. Serve Sundays for a one year term

At the “Welcome Center”

1. Greet and introduce yourself to all guests
2. Ask about them and their families
3. Collect contact information from guests
4. Engage the guest in conversation
5. Distribute info about ROCC
6. Answer questions about the church the guest might have
7. Ask the guest to follow you to the worship center where you will introduce him/her to another member of the First Impressions Team who will help them find a seat

At the “Worship Center”

1. Greet the guest when you are introduced by your fellow team member
2. Ask if the guest would like some refreshments, etc.
3. Introduce the guest to other ROCC members/attendees who might be in the worship area
4. Help the guest find a seat preferable with one of the ROCC members/attendees
5. Speak with the guests after the service
6. Remind guest to go back to welcome center for their gift from ROCC

Focus on the interests of those you are befriending.

Have you ever looked at a photograph that has you and lots of other people in it? Maybe it was a school picture or one from a family gathering. When you see a photo like that, who do you look for first? If you are like most, you look for yourself first. Here’s why. Whether we like it or not, most people are really into themselves! The most important topic for most people is themselves. And honestly, despite what we might think, most people are far more interested in what they think than what you think. And so, when you are befriending those without a church home it is important that you understand this basic truth about human nature.

Now, once we realize this basic fact about life, we can use that fact to find out lots about the person we are befriending. We can understand what they want out of life. We can learn about their dreams and goals. We can discover what motivates them. And, as we listen and learn these things, God can give us insight as to how we can become a true friend to them.